When we think of professional networking, we picture formal events, long meetings, and mandatory team-bonding exercises. But executive coach Ted Klein says the most influential leaders see it differently. They treat the small talk most professionals avoid as a chance to uncover what matters — the details and stories that make people tick.
An elevator exchange. A hallway chat. A coffee break with a colleague. These are the moments top leaders embrace.
“You find that the most influential leaders are really good at connecting just about everywhere they go,” says Klein.
That willingness to engage anywhere is the focus of Klein’s upcoming Signature Session, Next-Level Networking, at the John Molson Executive Centre.
Most people move through daily interactions without fully seeing the people around them. Klein calls it “the Charlie Brown effect.”
In Peanuts cartoons, the adults are never seen on screen and their voices sound like indistinct trombone — noise Charlie Brown and his friends tune out as they carry on with their own priorities.
The same thing can happen in professional settings. Over time, people stop registering one another as individuals and begin to blur into roles, titles, or functions.
Ted Klein, executive coach
“What we do with our attention really, really matters,” says Klein.
Taken for granted, these moments pass without creating connection. But treated as opportunities, small interactions can reveal more than expected about what someone cares about, how they think, or what they might need next.
Habits as simple as eye contact, a pause to show interest, or staying in the moment long enough to acknowledge the other person can shift how the exchange is experienced and allow trust to begin forming naturally.
Strong networkers don’t script what to say next in conversations. Instead, they stay with what the other person is offering and identify key details to explore further.
“Whenever we want to connect with someone, we are essentially saying yes to whatever they are offering and building on it,” Klein explains.
Many people unintentionally rush past these moments by trying to fill gaps hoping they sound interesting or useful. Strong networkers do the opposite: they reflect details back, ask for more details, and use curious silence to allow the other person to continue and go deeper.
This creates a presence that makes these conversations no longer feel performative. That’s when people’s values, interests, and personalities start to surface, turning conversations into stories.
Knowing an interaction is brief can pull people out of polite scripts and into something more honest. Klein recently took a taxi ride that began with an unexpected question from the driver: “What are your thoughts on life, death, God, and the universe?”
The question transformed an otherwise quiet moment into an invitation to go beyond small talk. Within minutes, Klein says, the discussion went deeper.
“One of the constraints that actually really help us make conversation meaningful is time,” says Klein.
In a professional setting, where oversharing can be a pitfall, Klein suggests pacing as a natural boundary. He recommends sharing a little then pausing to see how the other person responds. This allows depth to develop naturally while mutual interest guides the conversation.
What separates authentic networkers from performative ones is generosity. The most influential networkers bring people together simply for the satisfaction they get from helping others grow their networks.
“They don’t say, ‘I put you in touch with this person, so now you owe me,’” he says. “They bring people together because they think, ‘You’ll be inspired by what this person is doing.’”
When interactions are driven by self-interest, it shows. With curiosity and care, influence develops naturally. A sincere connector leads with generosity for its own sake.
“The people who network best aren’t trying to get anything right,” Klein says. "They’re listening. They’re celebrating others. They make people feel seen and heard.”
© Concordia University
